Tuesday, May 17, 2011

the BIGGEST challenge in my career!!

(some of dis sems work)

wow.. actually, never thought its gonna happen to me.. i just failed my design subject, which mean i have to repeat that subject again.. arghh!!!! feeling frustrated.. and down. .and just ARGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

luckily, i have a lots of friends for me to get through dis tough time.. thnx to Qis Tina Ros Lan (ngade2) n all Fanarchtic, jasamu dikenang selamanya..

even rasa xpuas ati tu masih ade, but i really need to hold on and never give up.. insy, i hope its give me better future.. please hang on to me my dearest friends and parents.. thnks..

Monday, April 18, 2011

because you are everything that i care

sometimes, its weird.. when you needed someone so much, till you even begged for her to stay.. for me, i never done it to anyone else except for her.. she is everything that matters to me.. although now she said she forgiven me (actually just a YA, when i said im sorry), but i dont feel so calm.. actually, i just hope i never did that mistake in the same place.. i never have to be in this awkward moment again.. hurm.. if only i could turn back time..

dear friends,
no matter how long its gonna take for you to forgive me, im willing to face it.. no matter how far it might take me, i try my best to keep the pace.. as long as i have you as my friend, as long as i have to look at my hands.. i try my best to have no more lies between us.. i tell you everything.. and everything indeed...

thank you for giving me another chance to be your friend, its not the poem that touch me, its all in your heart that satisfied me.. thank you..

when you're not here to share my day and night,
my life is so incomplete,
for you are my heart, my soul,
the 'oneness' i had known to seek.

without you, i merely exist from day to day,
with you i know that i will find,
all that i have been searching for,
my completeness, my eternal peace of mind.

you are the keeper of my dream,
the one who holds my heart in her hands,
the one i want to spend my life with,
the one with whom i will always stand.

forever is what i want with you,
our heart may found one another
maybe not as lovers,not as a soul-mate,
but as friends it shall do...

Sunday, April 17, 2011

kerana satu

because of the one thing i did, she would never believe me again.. because of one thing i do wrong, she will never listen to me again..

i dunno what else to do.. if i can make a wish on the falling stars, i will wait for the star to fall.. hurm.. i really miss her.. i miss her soo much.. my life never been this horrible.. everything that i've done remind me of her.. her laughter, her smile, her attitude, her cute little face.. arghhh!!!! i really miss those..

please, if there's still some room inside your heart for me..let me stay.. let me build your trust to me again.. and i promise i wont betray it again.. i need you.. i need you.. i need you...


i never knew how it feels when one day i might lose you..
i never thought how my life would be without you...
caused if i do feel, if i do know,
i would never ever do something that might make you go...

my life nowadays seems darker..
the place i go cant even make it brighter..
only you with me, i feel sunshine right through me,
shining my heart and make my day warmer ..

i dont know any other way to ask for your forgiveness..
if i can, i will beg for it, but even that you wont accept it..
so please tell me what else can i do..
i really need you in my life, more than i ever knew..

p/s: please, be my friend again... i miss you a lot..

i know it kinda too late but i will try..

hey everyone.. the past few days has been the worst day ever in my life.. i cried, i laughed.. its all because of her.. the memory.. the dream.. the talk.. the speech.. i really miss her.. and i feel like further lost without her..

i admit it my own fault that i got a severe punishment like this.. and i didnt ask for her forgiveness.. i will beg for it.. i want to be with her again.. although just as a friend, its make me much happier than i am now...

dear Qistina,
i promise i wont do anything stupid again.. i promise i wont touch anything like it again.. and i promise to be honest about my feelings toward you again.. im begging for you to be friend with me again.. please tell me you hate me.. im willing to hear it again.. atleast, i know you still remember me.. i miss you my besties.. soo much.. im sorry..

Saturday, April 16, 2011

not proud..

dear friends,
this is the one of the things i did that im not proud of.. SMOKING!!!! please, to all smokers, i did smoke, and trust me it feels good especially when your mood is kinda unstable.. it feels like heaven and all the problems like gone away.. but the truth is not as it seems.. its hurting you inside.. damaging your system and everything.. i am smoker recently for the past two weeks, and i enjoy doing it.. but someone i care make me realize.. if someone hurts me deeply inside, why should i solve it with something that will also hurt me deep inside.. and i kept thinking.. and thinking.. and i decided.. it's time for me to quit.. its not good to my own health and others.. to all the people ive hurt, im soo sooooryyyy.. sometimes, i just lost and need someone to track me back home.. now, im proudly say, that i am a former smoker..

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Upside Down

haha.. my life nowadays is in a mess.. i didnt sleep at night and begin to get dizzy in the morning.. somehow, my life has change.. my stomach also quite demanding nowadays.. arghhh.. i really want to have a perfect body and perfect life.. guess architecture is killing me within..

i dunno yet how to survive this course, but in order to pass it, i need to at least enjoy it.. however, i cant!!! im enjoying it when it is not a work.. doing it for fun.. no stress.. arggghh!!! guess i really have to move..

so, to those who are thinking about taking architecture courses, be very sure or you will regret it.. :)

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

its all about her...

sometimes, we don't know where life might lead us to.. and sometimes, its hard just to look and let it pass away..
as for me, i thought i love her.. i thought we were really meant to be.. maybe not now.. but somewhere in the future.. maybe not today, but just around the corner..
guess, i was wrong.. she's perfect.. for me she's beautiful and kind.. charming and sweet.. and i really do love her from my heart.. but, if we were not meant to be, then i wish her the best to be happy..

How to Love Her

1. she really likes to eat.. variety of food.. give it to her.. she will smile and give you the perfect memory..
2. she always lost and need encouragement.. please do spend time with her so that you wont regret later on..
3. she is a very stubborn girl.. do not force her, but talk to her nicely..
4. dont make her repeat what she said more than twice, or she will get bored and fed up.. also, do not tease her, giving hanging passage as she hates it a lot..
5. you wouldn't found another woman who likes shopping and make ups more than she is..
6. keep your word.. always remember her schedule.. it will make her feel secure and safe...
7. give her some place to breath.. or she will leave you..
8. she has a really cute attitude.. treat her well.. and she will show you the cutest moment in your life...
9. she is really sensitive.. dont tease her about anything that may remind her of something sad..
10. if you love her, dont just say it.. show it...
11. dont go to bed before 2.30 am, or later you will miss something precious about her..
12. do talk about ex's.... she love it..
13. dont mention a single thing about married or e.t.c because it just out or her league.
14. if she on period, be patient.. girls have it crown.. ;)
15. if she want to do something, do it with her.. its make her happy and give her some strength..
16. dont ever try to give a hint to show your love, because if she pretends to ignore you, you're in a big trouble.. ;(
17. if she hits you, well.. actually she just want to get closed to you.. be nice and hold her hand as i promise you she wont let go.. ;)
18. dont cry, she hates it..
19. when you go out with her, be in your best way possible.. if you have a messy hair, wear a hat.. if you have perfume, dont used it yet.. leave it somewhere in the car where she can find it an she will do it for you.. ;)
20. the sweetest thing for her to do, maybe wearing a facial mask together with you.. but yet, of course the sweetest.. ;)

actually, there's a thousand way to love her, and she will show it to you if you concerned for her.. do love her, and she loves you back thats the best thing ever.. i had my chance and now i think i need to move on.. i love her.. i do.. soooo mucccchh... ;(

p/s : i really hope she's still mine...

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Why Guys Love Girls

1.The way they always smell good even if it’s just shampoo
2.The way they always find the right spot on our shoulder
3.How cute they look when they sleep
4.The ease in which they fit into our arms
5.The way they kiss you and make everything alright in the world
6.How cute they are when they eat
7.The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end its all worth while
8.The way they are always warm even if its minus 30 degrees
9.The way they look good no matter what they wear
10.The way she fishes for compliments even though you both know shes the most beautiful thing on this earth
11.how cute they are when they argue
12.How their hand always seems to find ours
13.The way they smile
14.The way you feel when you see her name on the caller id after you’ve had a big fight
15.The way she says “lets not fight anymore” even though you know an hour later…
16.The way they kiss you when youve done something nice for her
17.The way they kiss you when you say”i love you”
18.Actually.. just the way they kiss you
19.The way they fall into your arms when they cry
20.Then apologizing for crying over something that silly
21.The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
22.Then the way they apologize when it really does hurt (even though we dont admit it!)
23.The way they say “I miss you”
24.The way you miss them
25.The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesnt hurt her anymore…Yet regardless whether you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them… it matters not.Because once in your life whatever they were to the world they become the world to you.When you look them in the eyes traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without a trace of sound you know that your own life is inevitably consumed with the rhythmic beatings of her very own heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of a mind, but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt.

its really is not easy to let someone go..
but still..

actually, im not really feel everything that mentioned, but i do feel some of them.. and trust me, its really cute.. :)

its just me AGAIN..

HAHA.. actually, im bored and stuck with my design.. so, just thinking to play around and have some fun.. well, maybe i wont update this blog that much coz the previous one is like dying already.. still, however feel free to visit it any time u like.. XP.. just enjoy my service..